This news post filled my Facebook feed yesterday. (Click here).
And made me ANGRY!
Some complete jackass scams his co-workers out of their sick leave by faking cancer.
Okay, there are stories all the time about people who fake cancer. For the attention, the sympathy, the money, I'm not sure what their mental issue is (and clearly they have many), but it always gets me riled up. Even the gal that's been stealing my blog posts and passing them off as her own is apparently faking having cancer and using my words to tell people how "she's" feeling.
Seriously folks, if you want attention, you can have my cancer. Feel free...even for a day. I dare you.
But this story touched a nerve. And made me especially angry. Because I don't know where I'd be without a shared sick leave option.
I was SO blessed to have amazing coworkers who donated sick leave so that I could stay home throughout treatments, concentrate on getting healthy, and not have to worry about getting a paycheck or losing my insurance. These amazing people made it possible for me to stay home for the equivalent of one entire school year (split up over two years). One of these amazing people simply told me, "however much you need, it's yours. Don't even hesitate to ask." I cry every time I think of the generosity of this man, and all those that were so willing to donate sick leave to me. Large amounts or small, it didn't even matter (in fact, the district would never tell me who donated what, so they were really doing it simply out of the goodness of their heart, not to get recognition).
Because, when you get sick, there's a lot of people that want to help but they don't really know what to do. And if they have sick leave they can donate, it feels like a tangible, concrete action that they can make...to show support, to contribute to the cause, to relieve even a small amount of stress. It's no small thing that they do. I mean, what if, god forbid, they get sick and need that leave some day?
I will never be able to repay these people for the gift that they gave me. I strongly believe that being able to stay home and not stress about rushing back to work contributed to the success of my recovery. I could never say "thank you" enough for what they did.
And then you have this jackass who takes advantage of people who are so willing to help. GRRRR!
I sure hope you get what's coming to you dude. You suck.
Showing posts with label work. Show all posts
Showing posts with label work. Show all posts
Tuesday, May 12, 2015
Saturday, January 25, 2014
Friday Five...a Day Late...
Whoops! This is a day late to actually be a true Friday Five, but we can all pretend, right?
1. First and foremost, I signed up/created a team for the Relay for Life event happening here in June! Team Stupid Cancer...here we come! What is Relay for Life?
"At Relay For Life events, communities come together to honor cancer survivors, remember loved ones lost, and fight back. Relay For Life teams camp out overnight and take turns walking or running around a track at a local high school. Events are up to 24 hours long, and because cancer never sleeps, each team is asked to have at least one participant on the track at all times."
I am excited to participate in this event for many reasons:
2. Naps are a part of my life. I could not survive without them. My week looked like this:
Monday: holiday...attempt to clean house...ha, ha, ha, that's funny since it's possible all I did was sit on my ass;
Tuesday: Work 1/2 day, physical therapy;
Wednesday: Work, meetings, plotting world domination through making reading fun, 4 HOUR NAP;
Thursday: Had to take a sick day because I could not move. Not exaggerating AT ALL. More physical therapy, where she mentioned that working full-time is obviously a horrible idea and I should consider going to half-time. Yes honey, I've actually thought about that, trust me. Now, if only I could actually afford to do that.
Friday: Worked all day, came home and took another nap. Wild and crazy week for me!
3. Katy Perry is coming to town and I got tickets. The story about how I finally got a hold of the presale tickets is HILARIOUS, but I did it. I can't explain how much I need to go see this concert, but Katy's music has really gotten me through some DARK times this past year, and I need to be there in person to celebrate! Now, who's coming with me???
4. My brain still does not function like it used to and the only way that I can survive at work is to write a sticky note every time I think of something I need to do/want to do/have to remember/book title/instructions from someone. My desk is currently COVERED with them. Again, not an exaggeration. There's at least 25 of them on there right now. A friend came into my office on Friday and started laughing about this organizational system I have going...it really is a sight to behold.
5. Because I forgot to post the Friday Five on Friday, I can actually show you the family pictures we had taken today rather than just mention that we are going to get them done. A friend volunteered her services back when I was finishing up treatments, and I decided to wait until after Hawaii so that we might all look like we hadn't really holed up inside our house for the past year. It was FREEZING this morning...and EARLY. But it was beautiful out. And she captured some AMAZING shots. I am so grateful for this experience and these images. I know that I say it all the time now and you don't believe me, but life is too short, so you really need to get these things done folks. Take the trips, cross the things off your bucket list, and get some photos taken of you and your family. And I know that my kids wanted to die because it was "so early on a Saturday" but they had a good time (teenage boy even said, "it was actually kinda fun...not nearly as bad as I thought it was going to be"), but I hope that some day they appreciate these photos. I wish I had more of my brother and I together...from when we were kids and today. (But since we both hate being in pictures, that probably explains it. I'm sure my mother just gave up). So thank you Heidi (Heidi King Photography) for your beautiful photos which we will truly treasure. (And she doesn't know I'm plugging her services on the blog, so please don't think she's paying me to promote her).
Here are a couple of the great images:
1. First and foremost, I signed up/created a team for the Relay for Life event happening here in June! Team Stupid Cancer...here we come! What is Relay for Life?
"At Relay For Life events, communities come together to honor cancer survivors, remember loved ones lost, and fight back. Relay For Life teams camp out overnight and take turns walking or running around a track at a local high school. Events are up to 24 hours long, and because cancer never sleeps, each team is asked to have at least one participant on the track at all times."
I am excited to participate in this event for many reasons:
- Funds raised benefit the American Cancer Society and benefits people fighting all types of cancers.
- This is a great participatory/community building event...and doesn't require quite the commitment of a 3Day (which I totally want to do again some day...just not now).
- I am hoping some of my local cancer peeps will join me in walking the "survivors lap."
- I am hoping you will join my team! Click here to join! Want to find out more? Click on the event's "Learn About Relay" page here.
2. Naps are a part of my life. I could not survive without them. My week looked like this:
Monday: holiday...attempt to clean house...ha, ha, ha, that's funny since it's possible all I did was sit on my ass;
Tuesday: Work 1/2 day, physical therapy;
Wednesday: Work, meetings, plotting world domination through making reading fun, 4 HOUR NAP;
Thursday: Had to take a sick day because I could not move. Not exaggerating AT ALL. More physical therapy, where she mentioned that working full-time is obviously a horrible idea and I should consider going to half-time. Yes honey, I've actually thought about that, trust me. Now, if only I could actually afford to do that.
Friday: Worked all day, came home and took another nap. Wild and crazy week for me!
3. Katy Perry is coming to town and I got tickets. The story about how I finally got a hold of the presale tickets is HILARIOUS, but I did it. I can't explain how much I need to go see this concert, but Katy's music has really gotten me through some DARK times this past year, and I need to be there in person to celebrate! Now, who's coming with me???
4. My brain still does not function like it used to and the only way that I can survive at work is to write a sticky note every time I think of something I need to do/want to do/have to remember/book title/instructions from someone. My desk is currently COVERED with them. Again, not an exaggeration. There's at least 25 of them on there right now. A friend came into my office on Friday and started laughing about this organizational system I have going...it really is a sight to behold.
5. Because I forgot to post the Friday Five on Friday, I can actually show you the family pictures we had taken today rather than just mention that we are going to get them done. A friend volunteered her services back when I was finishing up treatments, and I decided to wait until after Hawaii so that we might all look like we hadn't really holed up inside our house for the past year. It was FREEZING this morning...and EARLY. But it was beautiful out. And she captured some AMAZING shots. I am so grateful for this experience and these images. I know that I say it all the time now and you don't believe me, but life is too short, so you really need to get these things done folks. Take the trips, cross the things off your bucket list, and get some photos taken of you and your family. And I know that my kids wanted to die because it was "so early on a Saturday" but they had a good time (teenage boy even said, "it was actually kinda fun...not nearly as bad as I thought it was going to be"), but I hope that some day they appreciate these photos. I wish I had more of my brother and I together...from when we were kids and today. (But since we both hate being in pictures, that probably explains it. I'm sure my mother just gave up). So thank you Heidi (Heidi King Photography) for your beautiful photos which we will truly treasure. (And she doesn't know I'm plugging her services on the blog, so please don't think she's paying me to promote her).
Here are a couple of the great images:
Friday, January 17, 2014
Friday Five
Five things about my week:
1. I went back to work this week. All five days. I am an idiot. I want to die. Surviving on three hour naps many of the days. I actually went in late Thursday because I could not get out of bed. Seriously, I physically could not move. By the time I got home today I hated everyone and everything. I am not a happy camper right now. THANK GOD for a 3 day weekend so I can rest and regroup for next week. Also, I would say that there are maybe 10 people in the building who actually even knew I was there all week, so my plan to hide is working. I will definitely have to continue this next week because I am not ready to be inundated with everything.
2. The most frequently asked question is: How do you feel?
If you asked this question of me today, I would say, EXHAUSTED and HOMICIDAL. But I'm pretty sure what you mean to ask is, in general, how am I doing? So, the answer to that question is, yes, I do look much healthier than I did. (That's mostly thanks to the sunshine in Hawaii and the tiny amount of tan I have. Oh, and my awesome hair). I would say on a day to day basis, not taking into account the lymphedema (see #3), I do feel better than I have in a very long time. On your scale of 10, I am probably a 4, on my scale of 10, I'm probably a 6. I don't ever see a day where I will be a 10 again in my life, but I am making progress and not really concerned that I'm not feeling a 10. I have learned to adjust to the "new normal" (which are actually two words I now hate). I am surviving, and that's what's important. Still very tired all the time though. Please be patient with me.
2a. MAJOR BONUS POINTS to the husband who came home with ice cream bars on Thursday because he somehow sensed I was on the verge of killing people. DEFINITELY helped me keep my sanity. And now I'm remembering that there might be a cupcake Groupon we have to spend. I think I will need those to get through this week.
3. Finally started physical therapy this week for the lymphedema. Which has really gotten bad this week and hurts like crazy right now. Here are all the fun things that I've learned about that:
1. I went back to work this week. All five days. I am an idiot. I want to die. Surviving on three hour naps many of the days. I actually went in late Thursday because I could not get out of bed. Seriously, I physically could not move. By the time I got home today I hated everyone and everything. I am not a happy camper right now. THANK GOD for a 3 day weekend so I can rest and regroup for next week. Also, I would say that there are maybe 10 people in the building who actually even knew I was there all week, so my plan to hide is working. I will definitely have to continue this next week because I am not ready to be inundated with everything.
2. The most frequently asked question is: How do you feel?
If you asked this question of me today, I would say, EXHAUSTED and HOMICIDAL. But I'm pretty sure what you mean to ask is, in general, how am I doing? So, the answer to that question is, yes, I do look much healthier than I did. (That's mostly thanks to the sunshine in Hawaii and the tiny amount of tan I have. Oh, and my awesome hair). I would say on a day to day basis, not taking into account the lymphedema (see #3), I do feel better than I have in a very long time. On your scale of 10, I am probably a 4, on my scale of 10, I'm probably a 6. I don't ever see a day where I will be a 10 again in my life, but I am making progress and not really concerned that I'm not feeling a 10. I have learned to adjust to the "new normal" (which are actually two words I now hate). I am surviving, and that's what's important. Still very tired all the time though. Please be patient with me.
2a. MAJOR BONUS POINTS to the husband who came home with ice cream bars on Thursday because he somehow sensed I was on the verge of killing people. DEFINITELY helped me keep my sanity. And now I'm remembering that there might be a cupcake Groupon we have to spend. I think I will need those to get through this week.
3. Finally started physical therapy this week for the lymphedema. Which has really gotten bad this week and hurts like crazy right now. Here are all the fun things that I've learned about that:
- ALL the times over the past year plus that I've complained about pain in my shoulder, shoulder blade, back, arm, and around my scar can probably all be attributed now to lymphedema that no one recognized before. UGH! I should have started this therapy LONG ago.
- The yoga, push-ups, and many of the things I have been doing lately to get back into shape are actually making it worse. WHOOPS! No more exercises where all your weight is supported by your arms.
- Also, not allowed to lift anything over 8 pounds. WHOOPS #2. I did not even mention all the heavy lifting I have been doing.
- Why did it get worse in Vegas and better in Hawaii? The plane ride to Vegas aggravated it which is why it started 3 days after we landed there. And then irritated again by the plane ride home. It got better in Hawaii (not worse) because I was drinking a TON of water and I was NOT STRESSED. And it got worse 3 days after we arrived home because of the plane ride. And it's possible I'm not drinking nearly enough water here.
- I'm not supposed to be taking long, hot showers. YIKES! How the hell am I supposed to motivate myself to get out of bed now?!?!
- I'm also not supposed to be doing dishes, cleaning bathrooms, or being around anyone or anything that can give me an infection (sickly middle school children??). While this sounds lovely, it is completely impractical so I just nod my head whenever she mentions these things.
4. Very excited for several things which have fallen into place this week. Will keep you guessing for now. The only things that are getting me through right now.
5. Workouts are WAY OFF COURSE right now. Will be fixing this starting tomorrow! Or maybe Sunday. Monday at the latest. HONEST! Clearly I need people to get me moving as I am incapable to getting motivated by myself. So, if you ever want to go walking, HOLLER!
Friday, January 10, 2014
Friday Five
This week's Friday Five:
1. So, the lymphedema that had gotten better in Hawaii started flaring up again on Wednesday. UGH! This is definitely a sign from God, I think, that I need to not live here! I will discuss this at physical therapy next week.
2. I am DREADING going back to work on Monday. Please do not ask what has possessed me to do such a crazy thing. Keith and I have an agreement and part of it involves my going back to work. UGH! I have told almost NO ONE that I will be back in the building so that I can spend at least the first week (or two...or more...) holed up in my office trying to get back into the swing of things. We will see how long it takes the "secret" to get out.
3. We are getting family portraits taken this weekend. For the first time since the girl child was a baby. I might be the only one excited about this prospect. Here is a preview of what we will be wearing. Stay tuned for more pics after the shoot!
1. So, the lymphedema that had gotten better in Hawaii started flaring up again on Wednesday. UGH! This is definitely a sign from God, I think, that I need to not live here! I will discuss this at physical therapy next week.
2. I am DREADING going back to work on Monday. Please do not ask what has possessed me to do such a crazy thing. Keith and I have an agreement and part of it involves my going back to work. UGH! I have told almost NO ONE that I will be back in the building so that I can spend at least the first week (or two...or more...) holed up in my office trying to get back into the swing of things. We will see how long it takes the "secret" to get out.
3. We are getting family portraits taken this weekend. For the first time since the girl child was a baby. I might be the only one excited about this prospect. Here is a preview of what we will be wearing. Stay tuned for more pics after the shoot!
4. The well-intentioned workouts which got off to a rip-roaring start in Hawaii have disappeared. So hard to be back here, and cold, and trying to get back into the swing of school and activities and laundry...blah, blah, blah. Must. Do. Better. Next week, I promise. I should start a countdown ticker until the sprint triathlon I want to do. That should scare me into getting motivated.
5. A whole week without a doctor's appointment. Gosh, what will I do with myself?! Alas, this will be the only week like that. I start physical therapy next week (two times/week) and PTSD therapy the last week of January (who knows how many days/week that will be...hopefully only one). I think my car can definitely drive itself to the hospital now. Will there ever come a time when I won't be having to set alerts on my phone for doctor's appointments?????
Saturday, October 5, 2013
In Other News, I Went Back to Work...
...like an idiot.
Seriously, my brain is clearly not functioning properly when I thought that I could actually do this.
I went back to work on Wednesday and worked the remaining 3 days of the week. And then came home and died. And then today I died a little more.
I told myself that I'd give it 5 full work days and then re-evaluate. Let me just say that after 2 hours, I knew it was a bad idea, but I will give it 5 full days before confirming my initial thoughts...which is that I'm an idiot.
What was fun:
Nothing.
Just kidding.
It was great to see everyone. Or at least everyone that has made their way down to the library to say hello. I have not been venturing too far into the germ-infested building. (I did get a giant goody bag of supplies to keep away germs...so perfect!!!) Plus, I might walk too far and then die and not be able to get back to my desk.
Talking to the kids about books has been fun. I've seen two-thirds of the school this week in the library and had fun talking about good books they might like. Plus, added bonus: giving a lesson to all in keeping one's germs to oneself. Seriously folks, middle school kids carry the plague, I'm sure of it. I'm working on getting spray-misters installed above the door so that they are showered with hand sanitizer every time they walk in the room. There has to be a way for this to work!
What was not fun:
All the things I've realized that I can't do anymore: stand up for any length of time; sit or stand in one position for very long; pick up just about anything; lift my arms above my shoulders; remember anything; and the list goes on and on.
SO. VERY. TIRED. Seriously. I wanted to die. It's possible that I did for a little bit today. I cannot imagine making it 5 days in a row ever again. (I'm beginning to be a little grateful for all these doctor's appointments that are going to break up the month).
I am in way more pain than I have been for awhile. While I expected the tired part (because, let's be honest, when haven't I been tired this past year?!), I'm not sure where this pain is coming from. And it hurts to move...all over...ugh.
I used to joke that I loved my job so much that they would have to throw me out of the building when I got old and they were tired of me. Yeah, that's not gonna be the case any more. I might love my job, and I might even be pretty good at it, but you know what? Entirely new outlook on life now. So many other things on the top of the list.
Seriously, my brain is clearly not functioning properly when I thought that I could actually do this.
I went back to work on Wednesday and worked the remaining 3 days of the week. And then came home and died. And then today I died a little more.
I told myself that I'd give it 5 full work days and then re-evaluate. Let me just say that after 2 hours, I knew it was a bad idea, but I will give it 5 full days before confirming my initial thoughts...which is that I'm an idiot.
What was fun:
Nothing.
Just kidding.
It was great to see everyone. Or at least everyone that has made their way down to the library to say hello. I have not been venturing too far into the germ-infested building. (I did get a giant goody bag of supplies to keep away germs...so perfect!!!) Plus, I might walk too far and then die and not be able to get back to my desk.
Talking to the kids about books has been fun. I've seen two-thirds of the school this week in the library and had fun talking about good books they might like. Plus, added bonus: giving a lesson to all in keeping one's germs to oneself. Seriously folks, middle school kids carry the plague, I'm sure of it. I'm working on getting spray-misters installed above the door so that they are showered with hand sanitizer every time they walk in the room. There has to be a way for this to work!
What was not fun:
All the things I've realized that I can't do anymore: stand up for any length of time; sit or stand in one position for very long; pick up just about anything; lift my arms above my shoulders; remember anything; and the list goes on and on.
SO. VERY. TIRED. Seriously. I wanted to die. It's possible that I did for a little bit today. I cannot imagine making it 5 days in a row ever again. (I'm beginning to be a little grateful for all these doctor's appointments that are going to break up the month).
I am in way more pain than I have been for awhile. While I expected the tired part (because, let's be honest, when haven't I been tired this past year?!), I'm not sure where this pain is coming from. And it hurts to move...all over...ugh.
I used to joke that I loved my job so much that they would have to throw me out of the building when I got old and they were tired of me. Yeah, that's not gonna be the case any more. I might love my job, and I might even be pretty good at it, but you know what? Entirely new outlook on life now. So many other things on the top of the list.
Tuesday, November 27, 2012
Back to Work...Otherwise Known as Stupid Ideas that I've Had
Since I didn't really have anything going on until Friday (when I have yet another surgery...stay tuned for details), I decided to go back to work this week. I was thinking it would be good to actually get out of the house, get some things done, see some friends, and continue pretending to be normal for just a little while longer. Well, that and try to salvage a sick day or two where I can.
Clearly I am on crack! What was I thinking?! :)
First, don't get me wrong, it is great to see all my Evergreen family and be back in the building. However, it has made me realize it's time to stop pretending I'm normal. (Let me take that back...I'm not actually normal anyway. I am slightly crazy on a good day, so maybe normal isn't the word to be using. Let's go with healthy).
The school day starts WAY too early. Now, this is not new information to me. I didn't like getting up at 6:30am on a good day, but I really don't like it now. I am tired all the time, and was starting to notice this need for naps while in Vegas last week. I have unfortunately gotten used to a weird sleep schedule that involves lots of naps during the day and not sleeping much at night. Yeah, that might have something to do with it. Going to bed at 2am and getting up at 5:45am to wake up the teenager isn't really helping either. Standing on my feet all day, being nice to middle schoolers, dealing with the craziness that is the day to day life of anyone who works in a school...it's exhausting!
Two days down, two days to go this week...I think I can, I think I can, I think I can. Or, as Dory says, "Just keep swimming."
Wednesday, October 10, 2012
Telling People Makes it Real
October 10, 2012:
Today, I make the decision to tell the people at work. At this point, many of them know why I was out last week, and if I suddenly stop showing up, rumors will start to swirl. So at a stand-up faculty meeting after school, the wonderful VP tells everyone my diagnosis and what we think it means. God bless this woman for being able to stand up there and do what I knew I could not!
Unfortunately, I don't know a whole lot, so that really sucks for everyone. At this point, I think treatment (whatever that means) will be fast, and I'll be gone until the New Year. Donations of sick days are appreciated, and thank you to my wonderful Evergreen family for jumping on that bandwagon. I am not worried about time off!
What I discover, is that telling people has made it real. And a little scary, especially all the unknowns. What I also discovered, is that I work with amazing people and it's made the first step in the process a little easier. I also learned that a new co-worker went through the same thing at the same age, and when I'm ready, she is going to be my sounding board.
Still haven't told the kids. Just can't do it with all the unknowns. And it's homecoming week for my son, and who wants to ruin that? And my parents are still in Hawaii, which is good because I'm a big chicken anyway.
Besides my co-workers, I have told a friend who lives in the neighborhood and helps me with Pantry Packs, as well as my best friend from school. I am slowly realizing that I don't really want to have this conversation 100 times. Facebook is looking more and more like not such a bad way to tell people. That must make me a horrible person, right?
Today, I make the decision to tell the people at work. At this point, many of them know why I was out last week, and if I suddenly stop showing up, rumors will start to swirl. So at a stand-up faculty meeting after school, the wonderful VP tells everyone my diagnosis and what we think it means. God bless this woman for being able to stand up there and do what I knew I could not!
Unfortunately, I don't know a whole lot, so that really sucks for everyone. At this point, I think treatment (whatever that means) will be fast, and I'll be gone until the New Year. Donations of sick days are appreciated, and thank you to my wonderful Evergreen family for jumping on that bandwagon. I am not worried about time off!
What I discover, is that telling people has made it real. And a little scary, especially all the unknowns. What I also discovered, is that I work with amazing people and it's made the first step in the process a little easier. I also learned that a new co-worker went through the same thing at the same age, and when I'm ready, she is going to be my sounding board.
Still haven't told the kids. Just can't do it with all the unknowns. And it's homecoming week for my son, and who wants to ruin that? And my parents are still in Hawaii, which is good because I'm a big chicken anyway.
Besides my co-workers, I have told a friend who lives in the neighborhood and helps me with Pantry Packs, as well as my best friend from school. I am slowly realizing that I don't really want to have this conversation 100 times. Facebook is looking more and more like not such a bad way to tell people. That must make me a horrible person, right?
Tuesday, October 9, 2012
Now What?
October 9, 2012:
It's the next morning, and I have to go to work so that I can tell someone in person that I won't be in to work today. All I really want to do is throw up, so how can I go to work and be nice to kids? Especially middle school kids.
I spend an hour in the Vice Principal's office, a lovely young woman who now has the sole responsibility for keeping it together for the rest of the day by not telling anyone else, while I go home and be a vegetable.
We don't know anything yet as far as types, treatment options, course of action, next steps, so we can't tell the kids. I'm having an MRI on Thursday evening, then meet with the oncologist in a week, then back with the surgeon next Thursday. It's not until all three of these are done that I will "know" what is going to happen.
The funny thing here is that long ago I committed to presenting a 3 hour seminar on YA literature at a state conference this week. I'm still going to do it, because it is a welcome distraction and keeps me from surfing the Internet for answers. I know better than to start typing things into Google at this point!
The throw up feeling in the pit of my stomach never does go away, and this is the first of many days to come where I really don't eat much. And I'm definitely not sleeping. And damn if one of the shows we watch isn't having a storyline with the main character getting breast cancer.
I am a concrete, sequential, process type of person. Just give me details, answers, and a schedule and let's go! This waiting thing SUCKS!
It's the next morning, and I have to go to work so that I can tell someone in person that I won't be in to work today. All I really want to do is throw up, so how can I go to work and be nice to kids? Especially middle school kids.
I spend an hour in the Vice Principal's office, a lovely young woman who now has the sole responsibility for keeping it together for the rest of the day by not telling anyone else, while I go home and be a vegetable.
We don't know anything yet as far as types, treatment options, course of action, next steps, so we can't tell the kids. I'm having an MRI on Thursday evening, then meet with the oncologist in a week, then back with the surgeon next Thursday. It's not until all three of these are done that I will "know" what is going to happen.
The funny thing here is that long ago I committed to presenting a 3 hour seminar on YA literature at a state conference this week. I'm still going to do it, because it is a welcome distraction and keeps me from surfing the Internet for answers. I know better than to start typing things into Google at this point!
The throw up feeling in the pit of my stomach never does go away, and this is the first of many days to come where I really don't eat much. And I'm definitely not sleeping. And damn if one of the shows we watch isn't having a storyline with the main character getting breast cancer.
I am a concrete, sequential, process type of person. Just give me details, answers, and a schedule and let's go! This waiting thing SUCKS!
Saturday, October 6, 2012
Waiting for Results Again
October 6, 2012:
Saturday morning and I'm still in pain. I did make it out and about yesterday to take my son to get a haircut and grab a drink with a friend. I was still all bandaged up though and today is the day when I'm gonna peel off the giant bandages (stuck on with what feels like duct tape!). This will leave the steri-strips only.
Everything still hurts though, especially lifting and moving my left arm (the side where the two lumps were). Keith reminds me that the surgeon said this would be the case because of how much digging she had to do around the muscle to remove the lumps. Really, and when was this conversation? In the recovery room when I'm still hopped up on drugs? Sure, I remember that...
A weekend full of soccer games ahead of me, and I never thought I'd say it, but I'm grateful that my son can drive (well, with his permit, but still).
What I forgot to mention the other day was that Thursday when I came home from surgery was the first time my kids knew anything about what was going on. Pretty hard to hide anything at that point. We told them that I had lumps, and that they were taken out, and that everything should be good now. Perhaps this was not the best strategy, but it was the sense we got based on initial feedback.
Back to work on Monday. Ugh! I hope my left side feels better soon!
Saturday morning and I'm still in pain. I did make it out and about yesterday to take my son to get a haircut and grab a drink with a friend. I was still all bandaged up though and today is the day when I'm gonna peel off the giant bandages (stuck on with what feels like duct tape!). This will leave the steri-strips only.
Everything still hurts though, especially lifting and moving my left arm (the side where the two lumps were). Keith reminds me that the surgeon said this would be the case because of how much digging she had to do around the muscle to remove the lumps. Really, and when was this conversation? In the recovery room when I'm still hopped up on drugs? Sure, I remember that...
A weekend full of soccer games ahead of me, and I never thought I'd say it, but I'm grateful that my son can drive (well, with his permit, but still).
What I forgot to mention the other day was that Thursday when I came home from surgery was the first time my kids knew anything about what was going on. Pretty hard to hide anything at that point. We told them that I had lumps, and that they were taken out, and that everything should be good now. Perhaps this was not the best strategy, but it was the sense we got based on initial feedback.
Back to work on Monday. Ugh! I hope my left side feels better soon!
Monday, August 27, 2012
Waiting is the Hardest Part
August 27, 2012:
The school year is about to start and I have to go back to work today. Hmmm, how much do I care about this upcoming week filled with meetings? Not a whole lot. It is good to see friends and catch up. What do I say? Do I tell people?
I end up telling some people, and I kind of have to let others know because my appointment with the surgeon is on the first day of school so I won't be at work.
But there's really no cause for alarm, right? Just some lumps that will be benign. No worries. Let's spend the time complaining about all these meetings and all the work that needs to be done before school starts :)
The school year is about to start and I have to go back to work today. Hmmm, how much do I care about this upcoming week filled with meetings? Not a whole lot. It is good to see friends and catch up. What do I say? Do I tell people?
I end up telling some people, and I kind of have to let others know because my appointment with the surgeon is on the first day of school so I won't be at work.
But there's really no cause for alarm, right? Just some lumps that will be benign. No worries. Let's spend the time complaining about all these meetings and all the work that needs to be done before school starts :)
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